Going to see The Raven today...

Hopefully it lives up to the dark beauty and fright you feel when you read Poe.

Hit So Hard Trailer (HD)

I saw this movie with my best friend Erik last night. I must say it is a must see for fans of the band Hole. I would also say if you admire female rock drummers this is also a must see. If you can stand seeing Courtney Love speak, it's also a movie for Nirvana/Kurt Cobain fans. He's in quite a lot of the footage.

I'm working on a list of top 10 love songs.

As much as the strict rocker in me hates to admit it, I like love songs. I was thinking that I would make a list of them with links to the videos for your (whomever you are) viewing pleasure. I hope to have this done sometime next week or so. I want to make sure I research it completely. Although I won't consciously omit certain genres of music, I am doing this on MY personal preference and opinion. I am however limiting my choices to the 21st century. Music doesn't suck now, it's just some of us are too lazy to dig deeper and sort the good music from the stuff the media tries to feed us. Until next time :)

I would like to thank Alaric Saltzman...

Aka Matthew Davis for visiting my dreams last night. I am much obiged sir. Sorry, that even in my dreams I am faithful to my boyfriend. But it was nice that my dream-mind put you in there for my viewing pleasure. See you on my DVR for Vampire Diaries :)

You sir, are sexy.

Wasn't feeling up to being good today.

...so I wasn't.

I ate McDonalds and then went to Dairy Queen for ice cream.

I don't feel guilty. Screw it.

Lazy Sunday and the movies we like.

My boyfriend and I have been just hanging out all day today.
We made breakfast at about 12pm and have just been hanging out all day since.
I have noticed two films of the Fast and Furious film franchise have been on today. I've stopped and watched parts of both of them. Not because my boyfriend loves those movies because of the driving and cars but because I think I kinda like them too.

I would not have been saying this 5 years ago.

Ahh how love makes you appreciate a wider variety of things :)
I think I've had some similar effect on him as well though.
He does stop when he sees a Twilight movie on.

Compromises people. Not everything has to be so one sided and extreme.

I still dislike the American Pie movies that he loves and he refuses to watch my exhusband-in-another-life Sam Witwer in Being Human on SyFy.

But who knows... This could change too in time. :)

Hole Reunion

I want to start posting a lot more.

I was signing up for some affiliate website thing that claims you can get paid for posting content. I signed up for it, posted one thing, and then realized that I could do the same here on my own blog. And if I wanted to do the adsense google thing I could eventually do that here too. Plus, I didn't like their rules about posting. On my blog, this here thing you are reading, in the Lisa space... there are no rules. I don't care if you read this blog naked, in a strip club, while having a massage, with a therapeutic face mask on, while watching The Big Bang Theory (Johnny Galecki is super nerd hot BTW) or soaking your tootsies in some bubbly water after a hard day at work and you're a man. I used to write so much in my youth. It made me feel sane. The past few years I haven't written anything unless it was contained in a song. And I'm not exactly sure why I stopped maybe it's because I am pretty happy now when in the height of my writing, I was an emotional roller coaster? Who knows! I used to just write even if what I wrote didn't make any type of sense. I want to get back to that. Sometimes it will be stupid, sometimes it will be angry/ranting, sometimes it will be heartfelt, sometimes it will be poetry, prose, a list of things I like, a video I like, praise for a TV show, praise for a music artist, praise for a book or author, sometimes I'll show you how to do something (don't get offended if you already know how to do it, genius :/) or I'll tell you about something I did yesterday or today or that time in that place with those people and that boat... That being said I'm going to try to post every day here or some thereabouts. It's one of those things that I swear to myself that I'm going to do but life interrupts. I want to tell life to hold on while I post this...

I read a great article today defending my beloved Twilight.

Question of the day: Why *isn't* Twilight's Bella Swan a feminist creation?

This article says the exact thing I think and can't explain because of fear of being attacked when people say the character of Bella Swan-Cullen has "set feminism back 50 years".

A comment on this post actually stood out to me too.
Commenter Cece stated-
"It’s interesting that female characters that are labeled as Feminist (or Badass) are those that have taken on very traditional masculine archetype (Buffy, Lisbeth, Katniss).
Twilight and Bella cause discomfort because it hits closer to home than many would like to admit. "

Yep.

So... yeah...

About a month ago, I was laid off from my day job. This is of course always a blessing and curse when it happens.
A blessing because, I wasn't 100% happy at the job but it of course paid the bills. So I've been feeling quite creative lately.

I've created my own beads that I will be using in some new pieces for Empty Heart Creations.

I have been working on mixing some songs for my (our) new music project Friends of Ours. We hope to have something out in the online music world by summer. Hopefully.

I am also writing a story/book/novel/short story. Not sure how long or short it is going to be but I think it will be enjoyable for some people to read just as it is enjoyable for me to write (so far).

This brings me to a thought that came across the crowded plane that is my brain.

I was thinking about the concept of the resume and cover letter. My theory or thoughts on them is as follows:
How can you summarize yourself within a few pages? How can you list the things that you COULD be capable of if you were only given the chance or freedom or money or education or ENCOURAGEMENT?

A piece of paper could never define me. There are still many things that I am going to be. Sometimes the universe shows you these things and sometimes you have to go actively looking for them.

A resume or résumé (if you want to be goddamn fancy pants about it) is only a fraction of myself that I show to people. It is, of course, facts but facts always have a history behind them.

If you want to know about me, ask me questions. Because assumptions made about me, whether you read them on my resume or heard them from someone else or judged them based on my looks or something comparatively limited, are usually wrong or only a fraction of the truth.

Thoughts of a repressed, stressed, and overworked mind...

I am at work right now at what I like to call my day job, kind of at my wits end with everything here. Yes, it pays the bills but I feel so stressed from being pulled this way and that way by coworkers in need of my help.

In this economy, I do feel lucky to have some sort of cash flow coming in. But I wish that I could do something more passionate and creative to supply that cash flow.

Reading these on Etsy.com, make me hopeful for something like that in the future.

I guess, if I ever want it to happen I have to stop procrastinating. I think, that it's less procrastinating and more fear.

It's like that in a lot of aspects of my life come to think of it. At 32, I don't have a license to drive. I want to remedy that, but I'm afraid of getting into a huge accident and crashing and dying in the car crash or worse being somehow permanently damaged, maimed, or paralyzed. People call this irrational and boast about the freedom I will have from acquiring a driver's license, (and they may all be well meaning albeit quite annoying at times) but they don't understand the fear I have inside of me.

Maybe this fear stems from my childhood and the shitty way I was treated by my "peers". Maybe it comes from lack of true encouragement by family and friends. Maybe it comes from the post-traumatic stress I endured from my last relationship.

Who knows? I sure as hell don't, if I did I'd be working on fixing it.

Sigh... well, I am going to try to learn this year. 2012.

It would be nice to blast MY music in MY car...and everyone else would have to deal with it. And SELECT people would be able to change the station. But the people I'd want most in the car would NOT want to change it in the first place.

So I guess I'll chose that motivation to learn to drive. The fact I would get to pick the music...all the time!

I guess I have to find motivation for all aspects of my life. So I can stop being so aggravated. It's really starting to take it's toll on me in all ways...mental..physical..and emotional.

I guess today's a good day to start right?

Hot Famous Person Monday

This one is for the fellas and the ladies who like ladies.

I think that Christina Hendricks of Mad Men fame is one of those women who can make people stop and stare for a LONG time.

And what I like about her is she's not a size 4. She's closer to the average woman's size.

Hot Famous Person Monday!

I know I have missed quite a few Monday's so maybe I can make up for it with this one.

I am going to feature 3 Sexy Men for this Monday.

They are all actors from one of my favorite shows on TV called Boardwalk Empire.

First Jack Huston...Ok so, I first saw became aware of him in The Twilight Saga :Eclipse as vampire Rosalie Hale's human fiance Royce King Jr. You don't really notice his extreme hotness on Boardwalk Empire because he plays wounded war veteran Richard Harrow who has a mask over one side of his face covering his injury.

Second Michael Pitt, who I first saw in a movie I absolutely hated called Last Days which was loosely based on the supposed last days of Kurt Cobain's life. Despite it being a crappy movie (in my opinion) I thought this guy at least lived up to Kurt Cobain's sex appeal and then some, and bonus he's from New Jersey!

Third, and last but certainly not least, Charlie Cox. Even though he's been in countless things before I only became acutely aware of him when he came on the scene in the second season of Boardwalk Empire. Oh and giggity...:)~

I think this more than makes up for it!

Hot Famous Person Mondays -Halloween Edition!

I thought it was only fair on Halloween to have some beautiful people who play the undead on TV.

So... for your viewing pleasure I bring you.

Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley AKA Damon & Stefan Salvatore from the Vampire Diaries.







They're the ridiculous kind of hot that can only exist in a fantasy world. LOL!

Hot Famous Person Mondays

Sorry I did not do this last Monday but I've been kinda busy.
I really need the eye candy today too... so... this week's hot famous person is...
Clive Owen.

What do I need to say about this one? The eyes, the sexy jawline, the smile, the body, the accent... HOT.

New Feature: Hot Famous Person Mondays.

From now on, every Monday, since Monday's suck for most of us, I will feature a famous person who I think is hot. I will explain why I think this and feel free to add your opinions. I am warning you, there might be some odd choices here and of course the obvious choices too, but I'm not exactly a conventional thinker you know...

With that being said... today's hot famous person is:

 Jesse Eisenberg

Ahh... the nerdy/hot man. I don't know, maybe because he seems obtainable for the geeky/nerdy/awkward girl I am or maybe I have a fetish for nerds... who knows... he's just cute... to me that is. He's a true nerd without using humor all the time to cover it up. Jesse, I hope you are honored to be my first choice. ;)

Awkwardness

As I've mentioned before, I've never been comfortable completely in social situations.
But there are some people who are worse than I. I have a story of such a person.

I was waiting for the bus this morning at my usual bus stop, but the bus was extremely late. I usually catch it at around 7:05am but it was already 7:30am.  I am looking down the block from inside the little NJTransit bus stop shelter. As I am looking for my wayward bus, I see a girl. She couldn't have been any older than 17. Shoulder length frizzy brown hair, squarish outdated glasses, and sallow pale skin. Upon seeing her, I get up from the bench to get a better look at the street to watch for the bus that was now 100% going to make me late.

She asks, in a low mumble, what bus I am waiting for. I tell her the 772 and I ask what bus is she waiting for, and she says the 175. I tell her that I saw one about 20 minutes ago and that my bus was extremely late and I leave it at that.

She proceeded to talk to me in her low mumble. I spoke in my regular voice.
The conversation went something like this...
She said, "Why did you get up like your bus was coming when you saw me?"
Me: "I have been sitting for a long time. I needed to get up."
She said, "I know why you got up. I know the reason."
I said, after thinking this statement odd and strangely provocative, "What's the reason?"
Her eyes shifted from me to the sidewalk, "Oh...um...I know the reason...I usually don't like to sit down when it's cold."
I wish I didn't sound so quick and maybe confrontational in my previous statement. I could see that this girl was really trying to be social but really having a hard time at it. I can remember when I was like that in my life. Later on I realized that being silent and anti-social was much better than facing all of that rejection I faced when my attempts to speak left me emotionally wounded.
But still... part of me wishes that I would have at least said "Goodbye" or "Have a nice day" or something to that effect when I left when my bus finally came.

I hope I didn't come off as mean or "too cool" to talk to her. I didn't mean it that way at all...
I guess my years of social awkwardness and the resulting behavioural changes are really starting to show.

Sorry mystery awkward girl. I really do know where you are at, even if I seemed like everyone else at the time.

So I have been working on a new music project...

And it's unlike anything else I have ever been a part of before.

It's partially electronic. GASP!

Anyone who knows me for a while will be like "What the hell has gotten into Lisa? I thought she hated fake drums!" Well, I do, but this is different.

If I had to describe it, it would be Matt and Kim as goths. Depressing version of boy/girl harmony electronic and organic instruments together.  A lot of it was actually written on regular instruments (guitar, bass, piano, drums) and was then converted into an electronic format via programs like Reason and Fruity Loops.  Real vocals of course, I will NEVER, and this is a promise, use auto-tune on my voice or on anyone that I sing with in a song's voice. To me, that's cheating and it just makes it sound like everything else on popular radio right now.

This project is a departure from my heavy rock roots, but they definitely show up in a lot of the songs too.

And the project is called.............
Friends of Ours.

Who the hell created headphones?

While I was listening to music on the bus to my day job, a strange thought entered my mind...Who invented headphones? And did the invention of headphones cause musicians to write music differently? AS a musician I can tell you one of the best ways to edit music or listen to a new mix of a song is to listen to it in headphones.

So I went on the seemingly all encompassing information hub Wikipedia.org and looked up headphones.
Turns out headphones were created before amplifiers by a man named Nathaniel Baldwin and were pretty much the only way to listen to electronic audio signals before amps. And they were often so poorly grounded in the early days that a person could shock themselves when attempting to adjust the headphones on their head for comfort while audio was playing.

Pretty interesting.
So I ask my fellow musicians or sound engineers, do you mix with headphones on or when panning audio do you do it with the idea of how it will sound IN headphones?

Comment below. I'm curious.

PS. Nathaniel Baldwin could be the subject of a whole  'nother blog post. Quite an interesting man. But I'll just let you read his Wikipedia page....  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nathaniel_Baldwin

Social Networking is getting too complicated.

Now, I've never been a social person. In fact, I consider myself anti-social for the most part. I would much rather be involved with a piece of music, literature, or movie/TV show than socialize.

I am never one to go out of my way to attend parties or get that excited about them. I love the friends I have of course, but there are times that I will go for a while without speaking with them.

It's not that I am angry with them or anything like that, it's just I don't feel the need to converse with them every single day in order to feel close to them. But I have been known to write an extremely long heartfelt email or letter to friends if I feel that something is bothering me or if I really REALLY need to tell them something. I think it comes from this deep seeded thing where I feel like I am bothering someone if I speak to them. And maybe a little bit a fear of rejection. I don't consider myself cool. Period.

Social Networking is a happy medium between these two extremes. I like to type and use the written word as a form of communication so posting on a website for an audience of people I know seems like a good thing for me. So I've had/have them all... it started with myspace, then with friendster, then with facebook, then with Twitter, and now with Google +. Some formats have of course fallen to the wayside because of rendering themselves irrelevant or just being plain ol' boring!

So, I log onto my Facebook this morning and it looks like someone has vomited all over my homepage. There's some ticker BS on the side of the page that is telling me stuff I either already know or don't have any interest in knowing. It actually gives me a headache. It sucks because I really do like Facebook, when I'm feeling social, most of my friends are on there. I hope they do something to simplify it for dummies like me. Or, I hope everyone goes over to Google + and leaves FB like the desert in an old western: deserted and with tumbleweed drifting by.

Sidenote: For a non-social person though, I am having a party for Halloween/My birthday this year. But Halloween is a holiday for freaks to be themselves, so I'm not sure if that really counts...

So... I am going to try this blogging thing...

From everything I've read, Blogging seems to be a "must-do" for creative types. Since, I self identify as a creative type, I decided to try this out. I don't know how it works really since I'm just getting the hang of it.

I guess I will start by introducing myself formally. Not just a "read my profile dummy" type introduction.

I have been a musician since I was a teenager. I sing, play guitar and bass and I will try any sort of musical instrument.

I have been an avid crafter for about 5 years now. I make jewelry, guitar straps, pendants, and other accessories. I knit and sew and love to shop for handmade and vintage goods when I can. 

I write lyrics to my music as well as poems, prose, and stories. I was a more active writer in my teenage years but I am trying to get back to it because it gives me such solace to be able to create my own universe.

I guess that's all for now... I don't want to give too much away. ;)

Testing...

Doing a test of the blog system.